I can't deal with any problems without getting myself trashed.

fuck.

Jasmine you should try this.
What is it?
A flaming doctor pepper..
[you grabbed a double shot glass and filled it up halfway with amaretto and the other half with 151. You lit it on fire and dropped it into a cup full of newcastle]
Chug it.
Okay.
[less than a minute later I'm staring into the bottom of an empty cup]

2 flaming doctor peppers, one dos eqis, and one apple beer later.

Sarah tells me to call her. My words are slurred and I cry and yell. I'm throwing up. Shell is upset at me. I'm crying. I'm laying outside on a sidewalk yelling. I'm shaking from the cold.

You're never going to change.
You're right.
Then why are we even doing this.
I have no idea.
You're just a drunk.
I know.