Current mood:in IRELAND!
Current Music: Unseen- The anger and the truth

so on the plane today i made a list of things i loved and i hated... heres just a few

things i love

tom. red lipstick. independent movies. lead singers. indy record stores. new york city. watching people. venice. baloons. daqueries. kissing in the rain. hugs. target commercials. french vogue. the subway in nyc. marilyn monroe. toms smile. walking downtown. vintage shoes.empty theaters.winter towns. kelly green. you. scarfs. thrift stores. dead leaves. femmy guys crying. techno. painting walls. strange birds. con artists. grapes. european nights. true punk. tom. edgar allan poe. locally owned shops. macaroni. audrey hepburn. feminsm. debate. the second city. racism. reorganzing. photography. riot grrrl. protesting. rainy days. guitar solos. black and white movies. woods. tickling. umbrellas. mohawks. days doing nothing. bookshops. holding hands. vintage pinups. poetry. central park. roller coasters. designer shoes. nail polish. new books. words:festive and pensive. sephora. cool hats. modeling. bright walls. winter coats. the moon. punk guys. tom. accents. ireland. raves. coffee shops. celebrities. donuts. stripes. drives to nowhere. babies. belts. famiglia. sky. TLC channel. weddings. makeovers. Andy Warhol/pop art. being with tom. italy. everybody loves raymond. hollywood glamour. gloves. car washes. colored tights. scrubs. anarchy. flirting. cruising. irish music. love letters. mittens. tango. toms voice. spikes and studs. black hair. pasta. guys that play instruments. sweat. Baz Lurhman movies. diarys. emo boys. tattoos. lesbians. views from above. cracking bones. antique stores. old junkie cars. piercings. classic punk. SUV’s. kisses. toms kisses. takeoff and landings. europe. black and white film. foreign movies. marlboro reds. little kids. jewelry. lip rings. first dates. first kisses. smarties. jackets. sunglasses. tiffany’s. androgyny. SMART cars. Christopher Guest movies. high heels. tom. brown eyes. winks. laughs. banana laffy taffy. Misfits. red nail polish. blue eyes. 2% milk. grape juice. ribbon. James Bond movies. butterscotch dum dumds. xtc. Johnny the Homicidal Maniac. meow. punk shows. riots. lsd. guitar players. Gap commercials. frank sinatra. Rocky Horror Picture Show. Freaks. Monty Python movies. the 80’s. Theater spotlights. AFI. Buttercup. tom. bowls. blood. sex pistols. spinning chairs. caramel. giggles. old fashioned cars. central park. bass feeling. playgrounds. boys kissing. Psychobilly. Rockabilly. Upright basses. Bettie page. numbers: 13 and 333 and 666. Dead Kennedys. purses. big red. if someone wrote a song for me. getting mail. getting flowers. when guys are romantic. decorating shows. VH1 shows: i love the 70’s, 80’s, 90’s etc. waking up. watching american movies in other languages. falling asleep. big snowflakes. atmosphere. underground music. goth/industrial. tom. mall bathrooms. woods. trojans.reflections. cathedrals. tom. The plaza at christmas. walking in snow. graveyards. red roses. red black and white. dusk. big houses. crust punk. bolka dots. velvet. swan lake. pointe shoes. history. swirls. irelands countryside. pubs. B Horror Movies.

Things I Hate

MTV. local commercials. clowns. moths. mean teachers. poofy wedding dresses. people on FTJ. cockiness. people who call everyone ’poser’. country music. sticky clothes. distance. eggs. shirts that say baby, princess, diva, etc. Bush. mirrors. war. american flags. inspirational posters. on flight entertainment. overly religious people. pop punk. propaganda. the sopranos. britney spears. ashlee simpson. conformity. police. nazis. Madame Barnes. the Columbino family. wiggers. jingles. forks scratching on plates. school. facists. avril lavigne. word: behoove, titter. dry kleenix. dark roots with orange/blonde hair. the girls at my school. freshmen. cameras. rap. mirrors. modeling. breaking high heels. clocks. repetitive noises. uneven numbers. mall punks. hot topic. haters. stereotypes. cliques. government officials. frizzy hair. jerry springer. fragglerock. furbies. gary coleman. infomercials. Abercrombie. being ignored. Distance. Repetitive feelings

theres much more things but im sure i’ll add on when i think of them

so im in IRELAND! its so fucking beautiful. the only problem is that for the next few days... i have to wake up at 4:30am... and considering i can legally drink i’ll probably be up till 4:30... so not much sleep for me unless i can fit it in during the day. were staying at a castle! its so gorgeous! i wish tom was here... ::sigh:: i miss him... alot

p.s. vinnys doing alright thank god

you cant stop smiling:	True
you are always upset:	False
you kno that you are important to someone:	True
you call them just to hear their voice:	True
you go out every nite to see if there is something special out there:	False
you need to hear you are beautiful:	False
you have no intentions to talk to another man or women:	True
they are the first one you think of before you go to sleep and wake up:	True
you dream about them non-stop:	True
you feel like something is missing:	False
youll die for the person:	True

(T/F) You kno your in love when.. brought to you by BZOINK!

Name your favorite band for each letter of the alphabet.
A:	AFI, Avenged Sevenfold, Anti Flag, Anatomy of a Ghost, AMEN, Alice in Chains, Aus Rotten, Audioslave, Atreyu, Autumn Cathedral, Atari Teenage Riot
B:	Bikini Kill, Black Flag, Blood Brothers, Bad Brains, Bad Religion, Bright Eyes, Bahaus, Brian Setzer, bjork
C:	Crass, Clash, Casualties, Cure, Circle Jerks, Conflict, Cursive, Crystal Method, Cranberries, Crush, Coldplay, Commander Venus, Chemical Brothers, Cradle of Filth, Cramps,
D:	Demented are Go! Distillers, Dead Kennedys, Damned, Desaparecidos, Dashboard Confessional, Deftones, Dimmu Borgir
E:	Exploited, Emporer,
F:	Fugazi, Fear, From Autumn to Ashes
G:	G.B.H., Germs
H:	Hole, Husker Du, Horrorpops, Hank Williams III
I:	Invaders of the Heart
J:	Janes Addiction, Joy Division, Jefferson Airplane, Jitters
K:	Keoki, Kittie, KMFDM,
L:	Living End, Locust, Lydia Lunch, Levi Dexter, Little Nemo
M:	Misfits, Marilyn Manson, Minor Threat, My Chemical Romance, Mars Volta, Mogwai, Mayhem, Metallica, mindless self indulgence, Moby, My Bloody Valentine
N:	NIN, Nekromantiks, Nirvana, NOFX, Nora
O:	Operation Ivy, Orgy, Orbital
P:	Pearl Jam, Pipedown, Pixies, Pretty Girls Make Graves, Placebo, Public Enemy, Prodigy, Perfect Circle
Q:	Quoting Red
R:	Reverend Horton Heat, Rancid, Refused, Radiohead, Rollins Band, Rammstein, Razed in Black
S:	Switchblade Symphony, Soundgarden, Sneaker Pimps, Stooges, Sparta, Smiths, Sisters of Mercy, Sonic Youth, Start, Swans, Stray Cats, Suicide
T:	Tiger Army, Thought Riot, Thursday, TBS, Throwdown, Tool, Two Witches
U:	Used, Unseen
V:	Veruca Salt, Velvet Underground, Voids, Virus 9, Virus, VNV Nation, Violent Femmes
W:	Wait, What? noise,
X:	X
Y:	Young Gods
Z:	Zwan, Zeni Geva
HAVE FUN?:	i suppose... i forgot a lot of bands...

ABC favortie bands brought to you by BZOINK!

this is what happens to me while im really bored

Help me make the music of the night

when i went to a movie tonight... i saw... the previews... for phantom of the opera!!! theyre making a movie! and its coming out in december! holy fuck im a theater nerd

Coke and Ecstacy, Youre gonna blow your mind

i pierced my nose

please excuse the mess. i am slowly but surely redoing my melo, updating the backgrounds and fonts and stuff. and just experimenting for now. sorry...

oh yeah.. by the way... tomorrow... IM GOIN TO IRELAND BABY!!! oh yah. ow ow. modeling rules, yaya

i want it so bad... not having it is making me depressed and angry and unsocial

it hurts

i hurt

my grandma got me a sewing machine today

i went wakeboarding at the lake... swam for a little

i got new glasses... welcome back four eyes



i want tom with me so much right now, i really need him

i want ryan to be just kidding and i want him back alive... and ok

what a great show

anyways... today i tried to survive... was shit most of the day... went to the ranch... worked... survived... then went out to the lake, fuckin hot as hell... got really really depressed

came home early... got really really depressed

watched queer eye and i love the 70’s- cheered me up a bit

then janet came and picked me up and i went to her boys’ show. they were actually really good. and godddddddddddamn those boys are hot... ive known them for like... ever... but still... secretly like them since... but anyways... it was a good show

kelsey is so nice... her and her cousins got me all this beer and me, them and janet just sat around drinkin and talkin... still feelin it....

anywho... im hoping to stay online for awhile tonight... love you all

and most of all... i love you ryan... so very much. you were my best friend. and im gonna miss you so much. SO FUCKIN MUCH. RIP babycakes

xoxo
Bettie Rage

yeah i really really really dont like ashlee simpson

so im attempting at updating. ive missed out on writing so much that idk if its even worth it to try and recap the past month or so. schools out. i had the most amazing weekend of my life with tom. nyc was fabulous, we did good. me and shannon got caught stealing... lots and lots of problems came from that. including the fact that right now... im stuck in the middle of kansas. working. on a ranch. taking upper class kids on trail rides at camp. i guess i cant complain too much. i have my phone and i have my computer, and i have my family near by (is this a good thing or a bad thing?). its me and 15 cowboys and one really butch cowgirl. but oh well. tomorrows my little cousins birthday. hes gonna be 12. me being the lame cousin that i am, i have no idea what to get him for his birthday. so im taking him out to a movie and to dinner... and considering he usually has to go to whawtever movie his sister wants to see, i think he’ll appreciate it. i need money

if you care to donate to the Sarah’s Legal Funds... just say so... :)

i talked my brother into buying me my cigarettes for the rest of the week.

me and chris had some bonding time the other day, it was nice. we went to pueblo, where nothing happens, drank and just hung out all day, i got him smoking again... tisk tisk me. it was really cool though.

a sony guy wants to check out Fabricate...

im really getting pissed at everyone. people have changed so much just in these few weeks of summer. ex.bryan... it sucks... alot... idk... whatever

so tom... ::sigh:: this summer has been crazy, at first he was coming down for warped/lollapalooza... but nooo lollapalooza was cancelled... so now hes trying to get down here mid august for the Curiosa festival, that would be fabulous. im hoping to go back up to minnesota sometime soon...

my birthday is a month from friday! whoohoo, nothings going to change... nobodys gonna remmeber, just like last year... tom was the first person to say happy birthday to me... i remember that

so kansas... my moms side of the family. REPUBLICAN AS ALL HELL. theyre dissapointed in me. honestly, i could be a heroin junkie, lesbian, nazi, murderer and they would still think better of me because of the sheer fact that... OH YEAH... I HATE BUSH! we were in the car and my cdplayer ran out of batteries... so i was stuck listening to rightwing AM radio... rush can kiss my ass... oh well.. theres a place called Liberal, Kansas... and thats just an oxymoron

goodnight moon

Lying in my bed again,
And I cry ’cause you’re not here.
Crying in my head again,
And I know that it’s not clear.

Put your hands, put your hands,
Inside my face and see that it’s just you.
But it’s bad and it’s mad and it’s making me sad,
Because I can’t be with you.

Be with you.
Be with you, be with you, baby, I can’t be with you.

Thinking back on how things were,
And on how we loved so well.
I wanted to be the mother of your child,
And now it’s just farewell.

Put your hands in my hands,
And come with me, we’ll find another end.
And my head, and my head on anyone’s shoulder,
’Cause I can’t be with you.

Be with you.
Be with you, be with you, baby, I can’t be with you.

’Cause you’re not here, you’re not here,
Baby, I can’t be with you.
’Cause you’re not here, you’re not here,
Baby, still in love with you.

Still in love with you.