gunshotromance

sob stories

Ians an okay guy to talk to if you’re not already sad or in an off-mood. Everything he says is just sad or sick or reminds me too much of how I use to be. I don’t like the way I use to be, I get knots in my stomach just thinking about the chance that I might end up like that again. He’s a good guy and all, he just tends to screw around with to many girls and get involved with the wrong people. The hospital wasn’t my cup of tea at all; a bad heart (given), poor blood, anemia, rapid weight loss (given), stress, anxiety, mild-depression? Apprently this is all somehow linked. He said something like; "stress causes anziety, anxiety & stress cause depression, depression causes most people lose their appitite, appitite loss causes weight loss and malnutrition, not getting the proper amount of nutrients causes poor blood and anemia and its all making your heart weaker as we speak! DO YOU WANT A FUCKING LOLLI-POP WITH THAT DEATH SENTENCE??" It was just a run-on sentence of bad news.

my first shot gun romance.

In this hyped fever, tipping bottles and tipping scales. "gun shot romance" I thought I was in love, man. but it always blows up in my face. I wanted it to work. ...I’ll be more honest in this journal cause I know my sisters wont find it. now how do I make it look bee-you-tea-full? to love it, to lose it, and to love again. -amanda

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