Up at the top under community.

Hello from the random tour bus

I'm on the random tour on here and I just wanted to say hello.

So hello. :).

ah well I'm glad your doing better.
I like to think were all carwrecks waiting to happen. It all depends on who we crash into

not sure if you remember me. was just checking melo after so long. how are you?

That's so true. But then, nothing can ever really promise anything I guess.

That's bullshit. The bitch quit, her position was filled. Fuck her. You should start a mysterious grease fire in her bedroom.
>:( Angry Ben is angry. You'll get a better job though, don't worry.

Haha, I can't.

(hug) i'm not going to put in words. I kinda understand...but i'm sure you're hurting worst then i did.

if you need to rant on teh meloz, you know where i be.

I understand. I didn't know much about your boyfriend other than I didn't know much about it, but from what I've heard (nothing outrageous, don't worry) it just reminds me of how Louis treated me and made me feel and I KNOW it doesn't mean much right now (I still remember Maddie telling me 5 months after we were over that I would get over it and find someone better, and I still refused to believe her until about 9 months flew by/dragged on) but time really does heal. Not all the way. Whenever I pass Louis on the street or hear talk about him my gut clenches up, my heart pounds, and I feel generally upset, and knowing, or at least being pretty sure in my thinking that those things DON'T happen to him when he sees me, makes it worse.

But then there are the times where I catch a picture of him on one of my friend's facebook pages, and I just have to laugh because he looks so beneath me, because looking at him face reminds me of all the things I did for him, all the stuff I didn't do for him, and all the ways he took advantage of that by not giving a shit and putting his friends first - people he saw at school or at band practice every day. The reason I bring that up is because that was one of the main things I was told about when I asked how you two were doing - that he didn't pay attention, that he put other things first.

It hurts, totally, and your post stirred up what I haven't felt in a long time. But in the end I'm glad I got crushed and emotionally wrecked because it makes you so much more eager to find that happiness again.

My only advice to you now is to feel as shitty as you want, hole yourself up as long as you want, eat as little or as much as want, do stupid things you normally wouldn't (if you want), and just dwell, scream, cry on this feeling until it starts to lift, and until you start feeling open again. You'll build walls back up, maybe even bigger than before, but just take your time to feel better, then get back on your feet and feel proud that throughout the whole time you were together, no one ever had a bad word to say about the way you treated him. In fact, most people said you gave him too much credit.

I know that might seem harsh, but it's what people told me. And in the end I found they were super right.

If you want coffee, tea, crafts, or just hanging out, come to my place. It's a mess but there's no dress code.

Lastly, most importantly, I'm sorry!

Oh babe, I'm so sorry. I will call you as soon as I can when I get back. I'm hugging you from afar until then. ♥
You'll be alright. You should eat something though. Even if you don't feel like it.
I love you, see you soon.

What's wrong?

Yeah, they're pretty spectacular - especially live. If you ever get the chance to see them, I recommend it. It's an LED trance they put you in.

Haha. I haven't read that one, yet. I've read the Great Shark Hunt and the Campaign Trail of '72. Is that one good at all? It must be, HST is legend. Sacramento still pretty much sucks, though.

Oh yes, the Harley will be on my to-do list. : P

You should come to SF. The weather is perfect this month.
Never been to Vancouver. I have heard many, many gay Asians reside there - I'm not too sure I should believe that - though, I'm sure there's a few.

That's rad - it really was a spectacular show, if you dig on Radiohead. It's a beautiful park regardless of any festivals, though. I'm glad you got to see it. It was my first and last time going to GGP but I'm going back on Tuesday with the mother figure and little bro.

Yeah, the only thing neat about Sacramento is that it's pretty much two hours from everywhere - SF, Tahoe, Mendocino, etc.

It really is a great city. I stay in Sacramento which is about two hours away from it.

Canada, huh? Only been there once. Do you come out here often?

Dog? Couldn't give two shits. Three best friends and an ex. I used to dream of them a lot.

You should. I'm in a mood that only music can soothe.

I'd give you bangs if I had any left. : /
Great entry, though. It's entirely too familiar to me.

If you look in my Hashi art folder, for instance, at the end of the one page, it says that is ALL, but if I add a 1 to the url, it takes me to the older entries. I hope this works for you too.