you and i in a room alone. obviously there would be a kiss. it would be the beginning of marvel. what would i do next? hmm i know i would be overwhelmed with tons of emotions. that is sure. i would try to show you with actions how it i feel for you. i would touch your skin with my fingertips trying to make the friction last forever. i would make you smile as i caress your face. i think the first time between you and i would be sweet. the way romance novels describe.
from there i would kiss your neck and nibble on your ear. bring my lips down your shoulders and travel through your chest until i reach back up at the peak of your chin. i would undress you with the most delicate motions. trying to learn every spot on your skin as if it were a map of the constellations. i don't want to miss the slightest detail. i want to take every millisecond and molecule of oxygen to fall in love with your scent and skin. i would not let you slip through my finger tips, i would wrap your in my arms. i would guard you close to my chest so you can feel my heart beat race like a speed demon. within my grasp i would you'd feel the safety. and entrust your sentiments to me. i would want to make love to you ever so sweetly and have you comprehend what it is you are to me. within all of that i would want to find a way to freeze time. i want to leave that room smelling like you. entangled with your aroma as the web of a spider on it's prey. i want to leave you with a pleasant smile upon your lips. i'd want our minds to be in the avenue of never forgetting one detail of the night. i will unfold onto you if you will to me.

it was brilliant while it lasted. violent and passionate, at least for me it was..
about 5 minutes ago i've accepted your departure from my life. you've left your footprints with in me. i've figured that you will go back to whatever it is you think fulfills you. with that being said i may not agree with your decision.
you deserve better.
if it's routine you want, so be it. i won't forget you. it's simple. you came, you explored and you conquered genesis. set me free. i've learned that you're afraid to move forward... for as much as you argue over the fact that it's exactly what you want. i've beat my mind into dust trying to figure out, why? or when did i go wrong? or was i romantically satisfying? i've no room to beat my mind into nothing, i will accept this. but it will be the little things that i'll miss... like waking up next to you. looking back, 1 month is such a short time but.. it will last forever in my imagination. as i stroll through my memories and remember your scent. your smile. your gestures. and the way you'd embrace me fully into your arms but partially in your heart.
"all your friends seem like enemies when you're broken down and empty. so say goodbye to love and hold your head up high"
you're are wonderful in every way imaginable. never will i reject you.
a friend said to me.. going back to someone if you really love them is amazing.. but it's so easy to confuse it with going back to someone because you're accustomed... which in my mind must be terrible. i don't know what you really feel. so i won't judge. but in my heart you have a home.

it is at moments after i have dreamed
of the rare entertainment of your eyes,
when (being fool to fancy) i have deemed

with your peculiar mouth my heart made wise;
at moments when the glassy darkness holds

the genuine apparition of your smile
(it was through tears always)and silence moulds
such strangeness as was mine a little while;

moments when my once more illustrious arms
are filled with fascination, when my breast
wears the intolerant brightness of your charms:

one pierced moment whiter than the rest

-turning from the tremendous lie of sleep
i watch the roses of the day grow deep.

--e.e. cummings

the scent of your luring aroma invades my lungs. your pink-hued, plush lips send me into persistent desires... they fit magnificently with mine. i wish to infinitely savor your candy flavored kiss. your steady gaze. your firm touch resting on my chest. your subtle gestures of demand. the effortless sighs which expressed defeat by the man you've conquered--unwillingly. somebody will notice our endless affection. we'll be the recipients of jealous attention.
as i picture you, i see your serene smile after you release your heavenly grasp of your kiss. i see mysteries in you that i want to discover. parts of you i am unaware of that i am evidently desperate to uncover. all in due time. i wish you and i (us) to be the envy of EVERY soul seeking happiness and a fonder feeling, because with you i am just that...

p.s. you are gorgeous from head to toe... especially when you wear your hair in that pony tail that i absolutely adore.

Me Gustas Cuando Callas

Me gustas cuando callas porque estas como ausente,
y me oyes desde lejos, y mi voz no te toca.
Parece que los ojos se te hubieran volado
y parece que un beso te cerrara la boca.

Como todas las cosas estan llenas de mi alma
emerges de las cosas, llena del alma mia.
Mariposa de sueno, te pareces a mi alma,
y te pareces a la palabra melancolia.

Me gustas cuando callas y estas como distante.
Y estas como quejandote, mariposa en arrullo.
Y me oyes desde lejos, y mi voz no te alcanza:
dejame que me calle con el silencio tuyo.

Dejame que te hable tambien con tu silencio
claro como una lampara, simple como un anillo.
Eres como la noche, callada y constelada.
Tu silencio es de estrella, tan lejano y sencillo.

Me gustas cuando callas porque estas como ausente.
Distante y dolorosa como si hubieras muerto.
Una palabra entonces, una sonrisa bastan.
Y estoy alegre, alegre de que no sea cierto.

it's futile to change her shape.
seduction, entanglement, & word play.
she harbors such a dangerous weapon.
deadly lures molded into a blizzard-like touch
the perfect balance of unsteady vengeance,
benevolent beauty fitted to destroy heavy love.

charm pervades through her.
she bathes in simplistic elegance.
she is a shooting star, men will follow off cliffs.
i was sapped dry of my awareness
in moments, i fell in love with her.

i detest myself for not knowing how to stop

i was there when the sun met your eyes and my soul conquered yours. the message vibrated through your bones, ''don't panic.''

By the end of every day, i've forgotten who you are in my life. But the dreadful thing about waking up every morning is that you glide through my memory on replay. Picture perfect. Then, i start to feel and remember how much i love you.
The transition is simple. The pain is so deep it numbs all pain all together. The only way to not feel anything at all is to just sleep as much as possible. Even then, i still dream of you & i wake up hoping maybe to find you next to me. I am not free of this silent hold upon my feelings.
I am most certainly not perfect. I accept that. Sometimes i am said to be too intense. Fine. So be it. Isn't it better to be intense and demonstrate all feelings rather than just sit there like stone and never know if someone cares about you?
Either way it doesn't matter to you. Forgive me, it might, but you sure know how to disguise it in tarry dark water.

"None are more enslaved than those who falsely believe that they are free."
-Johann Wolfgang Von Gothe
Great German Writer

here is a thought to think about;
Put up any wall you'd like. build it high. build it thick. make it out of stone or cement. it won't matter. love is like the weeds you see growing in the sidewalks. it'll search for a way through and even grow on the walls you put up...

... until it finds a way through

do i have your attention?
do things get better?
no! they just get different.
i can't hide the residue.

in a gloomy, deep black world
the pain has become bright yellow
it's easy to see. it's florescent.

i'll try to lean away
& let the currents of time take me.

i've pushed as close as you'd let me...
even if there were razor thorns
i've made every breath used mean everything.

at least for me...

its unmistakable that i didn't turn on all the city lights for you. but i did turn on the street lights. and i know that city now, even in darkness. i've learned my away around your streets.

its meant to feel like her lips.

[tender, full, warm, captivating.
in every way when i get them
my limbs tingle, so exhilarating.]

like her lips when i touch,
that give me long lasting bliss.
i can never get enough.
alone, i reminisce.

the love which she perspires.
is pressed deep in my soul.
its only her love that i require
i urge it, even if it were not whole.

that's the beauty of this curse.
first, you get sick.
then, you get worse.
love isn't quick.
it lingers in you

its supposed to feel like this.

how did she do that?
it's not just about me.

i live to make her happy.
i live to make her love.
i live to make her feel.

i felt the sun through her vast eyes.
she implanted it in my fragile soul.
the intensity of her quiddity,
created my passion.

her power,
her elegance,
her simpleness.

i get stranded in her double-toned lips.
i get lost in her heavy gaze.
it amplified and invigorated,
my desire.

now it's my turn to make your bones tingle.

'give me a smile.' she said softly looking up at me. i replied effortlessly, 'give me a reason.' ...the night became still. her cheek brushed against mine. her warmth was comfortable. she moved in and whispered in my ear "im right here'.