blah blah blah blah, I juet felt the urge to update with lame ass-ness. so yes there we go.

HAIL MY BROTHER!! ITS HIS BIRTHDAY! CELEBRATE HIS 10 YEARS OF LIVING TOO!

Okay off I go.

Rawr desperate need of some Yummalicious NIN. They need to have their new cd out. >.<

Anyway its been a while since I last updated.

Happy belated new year.

I have been drawing a lot lately.

I will post some of them later.

Other than that... I finally got my hands on Counter Strike: SOURCE. Its running a bit slow but that is because our video card is a little weak. But thats okay. Just as long as I have it.

Anyway... I think I will update with somthing later when I have a better post.

*~*~*Tears I've Shown You Mine, Now Show Me Yours... *~*~*

Fuck him, Fuck her, Fuck this tiny thing we call love...

in this place it seems like such a same
though it all looks different now i know it's still the same
everywhere i look you're all i see
just a fading fucking reminder of who i used to be
come on tell me
make this all go away
you make this all go away
i'm down to just to thing
and i'm starting to scare myself
make this all go away
you make this all go way
i just want something
i just want something i can never have
i just want something i can never have
think i know what you meant
that night on my bed
still picking at this scab
i wish you were dead
you sweet and perry ellis
just stains on my sheets

'So there I was, on top of the mountain, and a cold gust of win threw me off. I was falling so far down, thinking that the ground would stop me. Then I could get up and start all over again right? No, The ground shattered and I'm in this "downward spiral". This void just isn't ending. With every couple hundred feet I fall, the worse things get. Nothing is just going right...

Tomorrow... I'm very worried things may go wrong, like me making an idiot out of myself. This will be the first time in 9 days that I am going to be seeing her. The first time to see her after the end. It still just doesn't feel over, maybe she thinks the same perhaps? Or maybe am I just to stubborn to let it end? ::Sigh:: I just hope thing will go alright... I really do.

Agenda for tomorrow:
School
Mall
Fifi's school play
Home
Whatever the hell pops in my head.'

Off my xanga to lazy to think of somthing new to relate to the same thing.

Fuck love and fuck relationships...didnt think it was possible but I found another Gloria... Fuck it all...

Assemblage 23
-Storm-
"Human"
Release September 27, 2004.

-Human-
There have been times throughout my life
When I fell so far
I thought I'd never stand again
I watched my dreams depart
These aberrations had their place
In the grand design
But it's unnatural to feel
So bitter and resigned
-CH -
Forgive me my mistakes
I'm only human
I bleed just like you
From time to time
So why can't I convince you
I'll be fine?
Ignore the writing on the wall
It just decorates
A place that I have lived so long:
Delusion's vast estates
There's nothing sinister at all
Gnawing at my soul
But these confessions that I give
Help me feel in control
-CH-
No absolution comes for free
And it never will
And those among us without sin
Are even rarer still
If imperfection is the lens
That you see me through
Don't be surprised if someday soon
That lens stares back at you
-CH-

Okay so my weekend was pretty good, I ate at the chinese buffet on Friday, and after I got done eating Sara had called before we left the restaraunt, she told me to meet her at the mall. So Vater (father) took me there...YAY! anyway Met up with her there and that made my night. Saturday she came over around 6ish, We sat around listening to Velvet Revolver, and then watched Invader Zim vol.2. We got done with disc 3 ate dinner and then watched disc 4...yay! uhmm...So we just laid there watching movies together good times....Today sat around bored played The EmoGame 1.5, 2, and possibly 2.5...Yup...Matt and Gabby called and I just got off the phone with them possibly 20 mins. ago. and yup im updating now...fuuun...okay well lovely weekend so yeah that about does it.

-Tears- I've shown you mine, now show me yours...

Okay so new poems yay.
Sinful Bliss

She will make every one pay
for there vile thoughts
for there perversion
she is living proof of judgement
walk with her to the alley
watch her move for you
watch her strip
enjoy that everlasting kiss
as she gets on top of you
for this will be your last
the kiss is broken
with the taste of blood
wide eyed you stare at her laughing
weak and unable to move
the sharp pain in the back of your neck
becomes more painful as she pulls an object
it glides out smoothly
staring at the knife she pulled from your neck
your eyes glaze over
and roll back into your head
as she walks off laughing
this is you punishment
for such a sunful bliss...
she is the torturer
and she will make you pay
for such lust...

Mouth

Dragged down
hurt and confused
my heart is drained
from the longest kiss
you’ve broken me
Poisioned me...
the taste of your mouth
I’m in a constant haze
from your scent of beauty
you’ve given me
everything I want
on a silver platter
I watch you give yourself to me
on a bed of roses
this pleasure is undenyable
and in reality
pain and agony
as much as I want to leave
nothing kills me more
than the poision and hallucination
from one touch
of your sweet tasting mouth

Copyright

FUCK MELO AND ITS CUTTING MY JOURNALS OFF