the_countess

WELCOME TO MY PAGE. NOW BOW DOWN BEFORE ROYALTY.

Hello passersby! My name is Anicia and I welcome you to my domain...

There are three things you need to know about me.

I tolerate no **jackassery,
I am addicted to cotton candy and trashy reality shows,

and

I flush public toilets with my foot.

.
.

ENJOY

**Glossary of terms:

JACKASSERY (aka 'bitchassness') is observed when you commit the following...

-going to someone's page and getting all butthurt and whiny if you read something you don't agree with
-getting all butthurt AND subjecting me to trash talk and profanity (because of said difference of opinion)
-nitpicking through all my entries and starting a debate because you think you can change my mind on something
-hating on my pictures
-in general, just being a rude-ass buttmunch who takes melo wayyyy too seriously and being hell-bent on proving your internet badassness

BEFORE YOU PROCEED, POR FAVOR....

I have decided to do some page-management.

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NOW THAT WE HAVE THAT OVER WITH...



IF YOU FEEL SO INCLINED TO SUBJECT ME TO YOUR COMPLAINTS, PROFANITY, TRASH-TALK, AND THE LIKE, PLEASE FILL OUT THE FOLLOWING FORM:


Photobucket


OR COPY AND PASTE THIS TO YOUR WEB BROWSER:


http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v327/arikel_tolifen/butthurt-report-form.jpg



You can send your filled-out form or raging hate-mail to:



igotbutthurtbythecountess@gmail.com

(yes, this is an actual email address)



Ok, cool? Cool. Enjoy!


FORGIVE ME. I DON'T CAMWHORE ALL THE TIME BUT...

Photobucket





LOOK AT THIS FACE...



REMEMBER THIS FACE...



MEMORIZE THIS FACE...



BECAUSE THIS FACE BELONGS TO THE WOMAN...





WHO JUST CLOGGED YOUR TOILET.


(*evil laugh*)

In these shoes? I don't think so...


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the_countess's picture
Re: public

LOL well, i get like that sometimes, too. sometimes you just need a good release of anger so you can relax.

the_countess's picture
Re: #18 - On Enemies and Revenge

hahaha! the updated version of the 10 plagues... i don't know, yet, either... but i think it will include STDs, brokeassness, cystic acne all over their body, etc. haha

the_countess's picture
Re: #18 - On Enemies and Revenge

With me, even though I know I may never know what happens to them next, whether or not what came around went around, I still firmly believe in it--even if only for the comfort and peace of mind that there is justice in this world and that good guys still win in the end. I think about getting back at people, sometimes, and I hatch out terribly diabolical plans, too... but then I always think of the Golden Rule and I know that if I do something to hurt someone, no matter how much he/she deserves it, it will all come back to me.

irishsaint's picture
Re: public

haha sorry....forgot to take my crazy pills again
;)

mikesmaddie's picture
Re: #18 - On Enemies and Revenge

I'm not sure I would even want to know what an updated version of those ten plagues would be.

Ai yai yai!

supereject's picture
Re: #18 - On Enemies and Revenge

"He'll send them an updated version of the 10 plagues" hahaha. I want to believe in karma, but it just seems too perfect to be true. I think I should attempt to follow it regardless since, well, it makes everyone act like a better person.

mikesmaddie's picture
Re: #16

How true, how true.

likesnowlikegold's picture
Re: #16

hahahahaha! i know, i was telling my mom once about it and she was like "doesn't she know you can barley even boil water?" i think it's just the way she bonds, plus i don't think she believes that i can't cook, and when i go out there, i know she's going to make me do something in the kitchen with her and realize i'm absolutely useless other that buttering toast and pressing buttons on the microwave. haha.

the last i heard is that he isn't with that girl anymore, but that he has some new idiot girlfriend, no surprise there.

hahah, i bet. i guess i'm just still at that age where i want people to think i'm an adult. hahah. my family is still like "aww, baby melissa" and ben's family is getting like that because i'm such a youngin'

the_countess's picture
Re: #16

LOL looking young is not a bad thing. when you're nearing your 30s, you're gonna get more aware of how much older you get each day.

so how's eddie? is he still with that girl? ugh.

and LOL @ ben's mom sending you recipes. you don't even cook. hahaha

likesnowlikegold's picture
Re: #16

yeah, their family was just insane. it was insane. i still talk to eddie's little brother every now and then because we were super close, but that's about it.
and his family is just adorable. his sister and i text each other daily, his brother sends me funny emails, his dad calls me about politics, and his mom tries to pass on recipes and always makes sure ben is helping around the house because she "didn't raise him to be a bump on a log". hahah.
i always hate that i look so terribly young, i cannot tell you how many times i've been accused of having a fake ID. or shortly after i turned 21, my nana sent me out to get wine for our dinner, and the guy seriously called the security guard to come and check out my ID because in person i look so ridiculously young.

the_countess's picture
Re: #16

well, i'm glad to hear you're already a part of ben's family and his parents are kind to you. you told me your ex-MIL was horrible and you really shouldn't have to deal with that. but then, her and eddie and all your past issues are behind you and you were given a clean slate--a fresh start. :) you're very fortunate.

and thanks! i work really hard to look at least 5 years younger! i get really excited when i get ID'd. hahaha

likesnowlikegold's picture
Re: #16

all i have to say is that it really isn't fair because he doesn't really show his age at all, especially since i started grooming him. hahaha. but yeah, all the girls will be like "ohhhh. mr. kaufmann is so cute"

and seriously, you don't show your age either, so hush!

yeah, i've had horrible experiences with parents in every relationship except for this one. ben's parents are absolutely amazing and so kind, but i didn't want to muck it up. especially seeing that i went from the beast of all mother-in-laws to a lady who isn't even technically my mother in law, but loves me to pieces. after he talked to them about this all, i talked to his mom who told me not to worry about anything, that they kind of saw it coming, and that they don't think it has anything to do with me which is totally refreshing.

the_countess's picture
Re: #16

LOL well, ben is going to be cool, cute teacher that his students will be crushing on. hard to believe he's already going 30. who am i to judge, anyway--i'm 3 years away from that age. :( darn.

hahaha! yeah, my one fear is my kid taking home a slutty, totally inappropriate girl to meet me. one that will give him STDs that I could not even think of. when i was still dating, i was sooo good with the meeting the parents thing--parents absolutely loved me. the first guy i ever brought home to my mom was my ex-fiance. he was studying evangelical ministry/theology (he was going to be a church minister). so my parents were pretty pleased with that. haha

likesnowlikegold's picture
Re: #16

exactly. i mean, i felt really sad for him. when he and i started talking over a year ago, i could tell he hated what he was doing. when he talked about it, it was more of "yeah, i'm become a doctor, big deal" compared to showing any enthusiasm about it, you know? i'm just glad that he's doing the smart thing of not dropping everything completely, and still taking the exam so he can use all that as a fall back. i did tell him that it's his choice completely, and i was going to have absolutely no say in it because i didn't want his parents to think i influenced him, you know? plus, i hated his hours and what a jerk he was being, so it's really better i stayed out of it.
i just know he's going to make such an awesome teacher because he's really laid back and has the personality for it.

hahah, exactly. i'm still convinced she's going to bring home that one skeezy boy who i'll absolutely hate and who ben will talk to about common sexually transmitted disease and how gross they are, but i think that's just the job of being a teenager girl because i did the same thing to my mom. hahah.

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